a one-way ticket to beefcakeville or the 4 species of douchey male weightlifters

every time i muster up the patience to lift weights at the gym, i realize…why i never seem to have the patience to lift weights at the gym. it’s tall and it’s hairy, and it insists on wearing cut off t-shirts and tearaway pants and it’s either busy grunting or talking about its friday night [...]

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why does 6am make my life hurt? or how i reconciled with this piece of shit treadmill.

every family has a black sheep. every litter of cute, furry mammals has a runt. every high school class has a nerd. these are the facts of life. they keep the universe upright and spinning on its proper axis, and they afford a certain commonality across cultures. in keeping with this trend, i’d like to [...]

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why does this parking lot look like the scene of a failed AA meeting or do people really act like this when they leave the gym?

today was a rest day for me, so instead of spending my evening on the couch reflecting on how awesome i am for working out (see also, watching Bravo unabashedly,) i went to barnes & noble to get a book (well, actually 2, but reading jen lancaster is like conversing with the sister i never [...]

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a resolutionary form of rage

i have to start this post by saying that i in no way came up with the term “resolutionary.” i must give credit where credit is due and direct you here to see the very creative and hysterical birthplace of the resolutionary. regardless, i am borrowing the term as i can find no better word [...]

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crotch sweat, and other reasons why workout clothes are the bane of my existence

i had a really awesome workout today, just over 7 miles with some speed-work mixed in to keep things interesting. the eff my life moment of today’s workout, you ask? please see exhibit a, and when exhibit a is this good, is there really a need for more evidence? (sorry for the bad photo, by [...]

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